Snotty guide to your perfect man!

Ngo Okafor

Are you one of those who planned to fall in love with the tall, dark and handsome man? Or maybe your drug of choice is the athletic guy with a six pack, clean cut and dreamy eyes? Or do you prefer them light skinned, hazel eyed with a romantic smile that lights up his face only when you are around?

Wake up, girlfriend……….these guys mostly only exist in your dreams…..and mine. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule and Victoria Beckham is one of the exceptions who got this perfect man in real life – at least, it seems that way.

He may be tall, dark and handsome, but he may also be a broke ass brother who scrounges off you all the time. For those who love the dreamy eyed guy, don’t be heartbroken when you discover that a lot of other women love those eyes as much as you do……and get its attention too. And for the lovers of the fair skinned hazel eyed guy who smiles only at them, I hope you won’t look across that mythical crowded room and see him smiling at someone else….oh yes! You’re probably not the only girl who switches on his smiling light bulb.

Get over yourself and get real. Step out of utopia and into the real world if you know what’s good for you…………and before your mother starts to torment you on the need to settle down. Between the hunk that drives me crazy and the geek that respects me and values our relationship, I will choose the geek any day………as long as he can pay some of the bills too, of course. We don’t need him rich or handsome (but he must have all his teeth………..and no body odour….a girl has got to have some requirements still, so forgive me); we just need him to have a healthy dose of respect for himself and others, plus a motivated spirit. We don’t need him to bend it like Beckham, pack it like Tyson Beckford, smile like Bradley Cooper or be fashionably grungy like Brad Pitt; we just need him to love us and treat us with respect garnished with some good slices of passion, romance and sweet surprises.

So, ladies, when sifting through the throng of available men out there for your perfect man, please remember it’s not all about the looks or the envy in your friends’ eyes when they meet your new hunk of a man (although that sweetens the deal sometimes) or the bank account (that makes life easier too…..most times. Don’t blame me for saying something on the side about this) or the dress sense (who doesn’t love a guy who looks good……..okay, enough of the side talk); it’s also about how well he treats you well.

So, what am I saying? I’m saying, stay open minded in your quest and don’t knock it until you’ve tried it (figuratively, not literally). You never know………your perfect man might be behind that imperfect smile, small bank account, awkward dress sense ………..all covering an incredibly generous heart. If you’re one of those who wished for your man to come with perfect looks and character, and got it – I say Halleluiah, sister; but if you’re one of those still searching and are yet to find your ideal combination, I say shine your eyes, open your heart and mind and have a moment of silence in every encounter. Your perfect man may be right in front of you – just not in your perfect package.