“My pregnancy was a particularly difficult one
as I was sick almost all through. A few weeks before my due date, I began to
have these nightmares about dying; I was also experiencing what I would call
premonitions about my death and it scared me so much. The feeling would not go
away and I became convinced I was not going to survive that pregnancy. I
started organizing my stuff and generally preparing myself for my passing. I
placed my formerly hidden bank statements in a drawer where my husband could
easily access them; I wrote a living will, listing my assets and how it should
be shared amongst my family, then I made a list of all the stuff my kids wanted
so I could buy them.
Days before I was due, I started doing a lot
of meditations and prayers to prepare myself for the afterlife. To better guide
me, I sought the counsel of my spiritual adviser who prayed with me and gave me
prayer points as well, while assuing me I would not die. By the time I got to the hospital to have my baby, I was
ready to move on from this world to the next and I prayed fervently that God
would receive my soul.
In the delivery room, the birth was easier
than my previous kids and didn’t take much time at all. When I was wheeled out,
I was a bit surprised because the drama I expected didn’t happen. As I lay on my
hospital bed contemplating the grace of God which had preserved my life, I
began to feel some sharp pains. I tried to ignore them but they got worse and a
few minutes later, they was excruciating. I rang for the nurse who came in,
touched me all over and said there was nothing wrong. She said I must be one of
those who feared childbirth and my ‘pain’ was likely psychological. She gave me
some pain medication and left.
Thirty minutes later, I was going insane. I
was still lying in exactly the same position I’d been in since I was helped
onto the bed. My husband who’d gone out after the delivery to do a few things
came back to see me in pain. I mumbled what was going on and he decided to help
me off the bed so he could straighten it, change my position into a more
comfortable one to see if that’d help. The moment he helped me get up, blood –
a lot of it – gushed down my legs, splashed all over the floor and I moaned. It
was like a tap of blood had been opened and it ran freely. My husband panicked,
rang for the nurses and held on to me. When the nurse that’d checked on me
before strolled in and saw me, she quickly rang for the doctor. I was wheeled
back to the OR and I remember thinking to myself – ‘I knew I won’t make it’.
That’s the last thing I remember.
When I opened my eyes, I was back on my
hospital bed with my husband dozing on the seat beside me. I touched myself and
everything felt okay. I looked around the room and my mind went ‘I made it’. I
began to cry quietly. I honestly didn’t think I would make it; I was so sure I
would die that day. The premonitions were so strong and so real.
The doctor came later and he could not offer a
good enough explanation of what happened to me; it was a mystery or maybe I was
too groggy to understand and I’ve never asked again. All I know is that the
blood gushed out and called attention to whatever was happening to me –
something that could have been fatal. I talked to someone about it and she said
maybe the dreams came to warn me of impending doom so I would have the
opportunity to counter it with the weapon of prayer. Whatever it was, I just thank
God for saving me.”
2 comments:
Wow! I thank God that made sure u didn't just brush away the feeling but persistently prayed about it. Thank God for u
Hmmm. Tbis story sort of gave me chills. I've heard about women who have these feelings, I hope its not everyone cos I would be so scared if it happens like this to me. Thank God you made it.
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