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Everyone
loves a great story….the trials, the triumphs and all that happened in between.
For the virgin, the story is a little bit different; it is a combination of
some triumph laced with a trailer load of trials. Triumph in staying true to
personal convictions but trials in being a card carrying member of a dying
virtue.
A
declaration of one’s virginity is met with barely repressed mirth, a ton of
disbelief and summary dismissal of the virtues of staying pure until the ‘D’
day. Like many of the other values once held dear such as honesty, integrity
and strong spirituality, virginity has been assigned scrap value and is no
longer celebrated. In a world filled with fast forwards in trends and
lifestyle, there is little appreciation for the virgins amongst us.
Nowadays,
a vow of virginity seems to be akin to a vow of living a socially drab life. They
are seen as people who have opted to live the snail paced lifestyle of the
Middle Ages and few have patience for them. They may be courted or made out
with but once they mention the dreaded vow of abstinence, the other party runs
out the door. And this is for all who
have professed abstinence – male or female.
A
recent humour filled debate amongst friends over this issue threw up many
perspectives: some believe the virgins must have suffered psychological trauma
which forces them to hold on to their virginity as a form of retaining control
of their lives; or the virgins are people who have body image issues; there are
those who feel that virgins are people with very low self esteem who hold on to
a virginity they believe is their only worthy quality; some think they are
prisoners of a morality fearfully drummed into them by religion; and some just
feel that the virgins are those with no ‘action’ at all.
But
for the virgins, it seems to be a case of struggling to retain personal values
in an increasingly sexually liberated society. In the midst of a sea of people
who want instant gratification, the voice of the few who believe that delays
make for a sweeter experience is like the lone voice in the wilderness – not
many are paying attention…or even want to. It seems it also makes it almost
impossible to have, and keep, a romantic relationship because it usually ends
almost faster than it began. From all accounts, it appears that climbing the
Mount Kilimanjaro may be easier than having an asexual romantic relationship in
these times………because no one wants to hang out for long with someone who’s not
‘doing’ it.
So,
with the constant deaths of budding relationships and a deluge of crushed hopes
of having an emotionally fulfilling asexual relationship, the will to keep
trying to find the perfect balance is gradually eroded in this extraordinary
group of people. No one wants to hear the virginity story and the virgins are
getting tired of telling it to people who don’t care. Still, their hearts
want a romantic relationship so they are stuck in a quagmire – to be or not
to be?
What
do you think?
1 comment:
Virginity is not considered a virtue by the social world and you have to be willing to continue standing alone. There is nothing non virgins want more than to get it back so you need to remember you have something extremely precious.
Stay true to your belief and the man for you will be the one who shares your desire to be a virgin on your wedding night and helps you achieve that dream
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